Understand Me

What do you want from me? I can not be your everything anymore. I need you to understand that I am here but in a different way now. I know that hurts you. I can not be there in the same capacity that I was. I have a family and myself to take care of. You may enjoy talking on the phone, but to me it's just a chore. I don't feel like it after I finish work, working out, playing with my son, cooking dinner, getting my son bathed and in bed, spend a few minutes with my fiance before he goes to work, get ready for the next day, I'm exhausted. Sometimes I do not have that one phone call in me. Or would you rather me call you and fall asleep or be a total bitch because I'm tired. Why would I do that? I just feel like my social life is too big for me now. It is hard to feel like you are being pulled in several different directions at once. It is not just you, you are not the only one who needs me or wants to keep me close. I need you too, my heart strings are pulling towards my all my loves and it hurts that when I think of you, I just don't have that one phone call in me. Understand that I don't want to hurt you I need to focus on myself. It is not that I want to distance myself. We all go through transitions in our lives, we move as time does. I am transitioning, things will never be the same. I am standing on my own two feet now. I can make my own decisions with my own mind without any outside questions, comments or concerns. If need an opinion then I will ask. I have to do me now. It does not mean that I love you less. I just have to do me now. I need you to understand that.